Friday, April 14, 2006

Leadership Decisions: Fix It, Accept It, or Leave.

There is complaining and there is complacency. There is whining and there is whimsical talk about why we can’t fix others or fix our boss or fix the co-worker that you saw flying in on her broom. It all adds up to the three decisions that we each have to make and they are clear, simple, and less than easy.
The three overwhelmingly clear decisions that we always have are Fix It, Accept It, or Leave. Okay, they seem easy and they seem clear, yet I also mentioned that they might be less than easy and I would even go so far to say they are deceptively easy, yet the truth of the matter is that these are the choices we all have when faced with a situation at work, a person at work, or a scenario at work that you don’t like or feel compelled to grumble over or wish to fix when it involves another person. Contagious Leaders fix it, accept it, or leave. Now, let’s dissect these in proper form.
Have you ever tried to fix someone? Have any of you ever been married? I mean really. Isn’t there an old adage that says “You can’t fix someone unless of course, they want to be fixed?” It exists for a reason and remains true an untold number of times. In fact, situations cannot be fixed, but situations can. If you have a situation that is troubling you that you can somehow influence, control, or modify, then by all means, do so. Don’t complain about the problem, create a solution.
“Grant me the wisdom to accept the things that I cannot change…” is a line found in many sources, one of which is the Serenity Prayer often directed toward God. To whomever you might utter the saying, remember the point, those things which you cannot change, must be accepted. If you were to look up jerk in the dictionary and find the clear picture of your boss, then why do you become bothered when that person does exactly what a jerk does. Let’s look at this differently. If you saw a dog on a leash walking down the street with his owner, would you get mad at the dog for walking on the leash? Silly enough, no probably not. Isn’t this similar in that we wouldn’t get mad at something for doing exactly what it is supposed to do? So why would we get mad at someone for doing exactly what we expect them to do. Try not to complain about someone being who you say they are, try to look at them, be fascinated and accept them for what and who they are.
I have always said that if you do not like the situation, cannot fix it, and choose not to accept it, then it might be time for you to consider the option of looking at the possibilities of maybe one day contemplating the thought of looking at the option of maybe thinking about alternative chances that you may have to somehow someway someday find another job. Please don’t misunderstand what I am saying. I am not telling you upon completion of this article that you should print it and take it to your boss and tell him or her that you quit. That is not the message and if you believe it is then please change my name above to “Cindy” as many of you have heard me mention in seminars. What I am saying is that if fixing and accepting are not options, then leaving is your lasting choice. If you choose to stay then it is conscious choice and what you are really then complaining about is your choice or your lack of ability to make a tough decision. Keep in mind leaving could easily mean leaving the situation and does not always mean leaving a job.

Most of these have multiple interpretations and I by no means have all the answers or am vacant of thoughts around the fact that there are variations on the clarity of all three. Nonetheless, there are always these three decisions and the choice is yours. Contagious Leaders make the most of the decisions that they have.

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